How To Build A Social Circle Of New Friends For A Better Life

by Geoff | Last Updated: March 30, 2020

To my disappointment, Mystery Method doesn’t teach a man how to bring an abundance of women into his life. This method teaches how to approach people in a bar or nightclub. They demonstrate this live and in field. They develop DVDs and ebooks to further that knowledge from meet to getting lucky.

But they don’t cover relationships, lifestyle, making friends or simply meeting people as friends in a neutral setting.

Dissatisfaction With Your Love Life

Cultivate New Friends In Your Circle

Dissatisfaction is what drives men to the Mystery Method. They do not feel successful with women. They either do not have enough women in their life, or the quality is not what it could be.

Approaching women in bars and nightclubs won’t fix that. Success with women involves a lot more than liking them and managing to take them back to your place from a club.

Success with women is not derived by how many you can pick up

Because bars and nightclubs are the practice grounds for becoming social, it is often associated with the place to meet them. The instructors focus their time and effort in these environments to maintain their skill level. It’s not the lifestyle for most people and that’s why your should know why this method will only bring sort term superficial satisfaction, until you meet the next woman with the cycle continuing.

The forum is inundated with guys that want to pick up dancers, for example. These are 9 to 5 IT gents. That want this type of women. Is that realistic? No. A dancer doesn’t understand what an IT guy does. There’s no place for you in her world. No benefit for alignment. Her hours are opposite to yours.
It can be done. But your game has to be amazingly tight. And I question what fulfilment this brings to either of you. The guy has fallen into a mindset of wanting something without considering the reality of his desire.

Most men know that his dissatisfaction is his issue and not the woman’s

Dissatisfaction. A man understands his dissatisfaction with women is not a woman’s issue. It was the man’s choice to pursue a life that women do not understand. Or desire. The man did not realize the ramifications. Women were not the forefront concern.
This is not a dissatisfaction with women. It’s a dissatisfaction with your social life. Which does not include the quantity or quality of women you prefer to approach.

Changing Lifestyles & Meet More People

How does one change their lifestyle? Tough question. No single answer. Let’s consider the nightlife angle. Assuming you work 9 to 5, go to bars and nightclubs Thur-Sat and practice talking to people. That includes girls or groups of girls.
Find the girls you gravitate towards. Learn what you can of their lives. But do not think of them as individuals. Think of them as trends. Looks for patterns in these girls. Their age. Where they live. Where they work. Where they hang out, what they like.
Emesh yourself in their world, and release your grip on your own. One year ago, I owned the second largest Dungeons and Dragons website in the world. Wanna guess what I DON’T OWN anymore? Gone. Done. I have systematically removed from my life my geeky pleasures in pursue of meeting people, building a social circle and making true friend.

My hobbies and anything that I feel detracted from the lifestyle I desire, I left behind me!

Understanding the difference between lifestyle and day to day life

Lifestyle is how you live your existence. It’s the world you find yourself in. It’s your day to day life. Living in the suburbs, playing DnD on Mondays and hitting the bar on Thursdays isn’t the lifestyle I want. I moved a few blocks from the bar. I eliminated my geeky pursuits, keeping only one. And building a grounding routine into it. I no longer seek commonalities with girls. I seek differences. They tell me their passions and their dreams. And I learn from them.

Opening Up Your Social Circle

I joined a social club (running) one night a week. I joined a monthly singles networking group. I’m a fringe member of two social groups that gather on Thursdays (one for bars, one for nightclubs). I’m discussing party promotions with a few individuals.
And I am seeing women more cultured than myself. They’re introducing me to new things. I’m not sleeping with them. I’m letting them guide me to their world. So I can sleep with girls like them, never bite off the hand that feeds you, but you can always learn from the hand that feeds you so that you may expand your social circle for a more colorful lifestyle.

But it is not about doing it so that the end goal is to eventually be with those women, but to meet other women like them (you need to keep them as friends). You need to truly think about building a social life and expand your circle. You want to find new people in your life, a group of friend that are truly friends and to do that you must also be a true friend…  and what does that involve?

Making sure everyone in your group of friends get along and only then can you expand your social circle.

Meet New Friends & Build The Circle You Want

Try your hardest to match people in the group that have things in common, but that’s not always each, so the next test is to make sure they just get along. A few things to consider when doing this task:

• See if they have the same energy levels (use your gut feeling)
• Match people with similar / closely related interests
• Make sure that you like all those people (it is not just about them, but also about you)

Do this from the start increases the chances to keep these new friends tight in the circle.

Once everyone clicks and know their position within the friendship circle, then there is no need to continue working at it and everything and everyone will fall in place… this is truly the best way to build people in your life while filtering out surface level friends and keeping good and honest people in your social life.

Social Circles & The Dating Scene

I’ve dated five women in six weeks. None of them were a cold approach. They were social circle. How do you build a social circle? You find people you like and you hang out with them. Sounds easy. But takes time.
And it takes the social skills you built during the newbie mission. Which I, embarrassingly enough, never completed to my satisfaction. It’s the reason I push it so hard. I did my time, but I never opened the number of sets I should have. I pushed every set as hard as I could. Which means 1-2 hour long sets.

Building a social circle opens up opportunities to the dating scene

I made a lot of friends doing this. Every friend I have in my life today with two exceptions stems from those two months in one way or another.
The exceptions? Retail clerks. You become a regular at a retail shop. You make a friend. You run game, they love you. You invite them out and you see them socially every week or so and they introduce you to their circle of friends. And your circle grows and so it should.

Watch your circle of friends grow effortlessly

How do you build your social circle? You don’t. You find established circles. You befriend as much of it as you can. And you get invited to hang. No reason to build your own. Establish yourself as the cool guy in a few circles and the works done for you. You get introduced to new guys and girls every time you go out.

And cold approach becomes something you practice. Not something you require. Because the social circle are people that exist within your reality. The hot chicks in the bar aren’t in your world. They exist in their own. And unless you want to assimilate, you’re unlikely to benefit from their acquaintance… unless all you want is a quickie in the backseat of your 52 Chevy.